I've been in SUCH a funk lately. I don't know what my problem is. I've been moody, cranky, easily annoyed and I just don't have the energy to deal with ANYONE. Except the kids. I always love the kids, tonight I laid in bed with Nate until he fell asleep just because I wanted to snuggle and then I stayed a bit longer. I need to figure my shit out (excuse the language. It just felt appropriate in this situation) I have been incredibly home sick. For my family. I'll be ok. I keep telling myself.
I'm starting to work towards being happy with myself again. I let someone into my life briefly and for some reason I have been damaged since. Damaged as in, summer of 2005, and if you know anything about me then that is NOT a good. Like I said. I'm working on it.
*warning. dramatic paragraph approaching. Feel free to skip. I won't be offended*
This post isn't for anyone. Its for myself. Its to get some stuff out and to hopefully purge out some of this negative energy thats been swirling around me lately.
I have never before met someone that has been so poisonous to my life in such a short time. Someone who came in and exploded like a bomb leaving nothing but shrapnel. I feel ill thinking about the amount of energy I have spent on this person. The smallest inkling of feelings I felt make me sick. I can't wait until this is a distant memory.
*dramatic paragraph over*
Anyway. I'm still here. Still kicking. Anticipating summer and itching to wear summer clothes.
Miss you all.
